Goals And Motivation Section
Is it possible to coach yourself?
The principal behind life coaching, as you will find re-iterated across this site is the revelation of solutions already inherent in the individual. In short, the coach does not provide the answers but helps to facilitate them out of the individual. In theory therefore it has to be possible to embark upon a journey of self-coaching. We believe it is possible to bring about change without the need for a mediating influence providing you are able to create an environment based upon the following conditions and you have no history of mental illness
- You realise the need for change and are prepared to accept that you cannot simply lay the blame upon circumstances. In other words if you find yourself quickly drawn into a position of placating your culpability by justifying to yourself that there is nothing that you could do differently and that the whole problem lies at the feet of extraneous circumstance or unreasonable people then you have a choice. Stay deluded or get an external coach to help you. If you are able to place yourself outside of the situation then yes! You might have what it takes to be self-impartial.
- You are prepared to ask yourself some tough questions and not shirk from answering them. Imagine for a moment that you are managing a number of people and feel for some reason that you are not getting the acknowledgement that you believe you deserve. Have you got the guts to ask yourself questions like… "Am I effective at what I do”? Why do I think that I am not getting the response I need? What response should I expect? Why do I believe that I should expect it? Is it realistic and upon what observations or benchmark do I base the perception? You have to be able to follow these questions through and answer them. It might be that your answers are going to be quite revealing. Tip! You might want to try writing knee jerk responses down on a piece of paper but applying the rule that don’t know is not allowed. For example in answer to the question, “Do I think the team accept me”? Your knee jerk response might be No! Don’t rub it out and write yes because you are frightened of your answer. Be brave and explore why and above all remember, if you believe you have a problem you probably do.
- You accept that through self-coaching you are going to persist until you identify a solution and a set of actions that you will then commit to implementing. You also accept that these initiatives might take some time to yield results although you have to be very clear about what the desired results are. There is no point in hurrying off to implement an action without identifying what the expected outcome is going to be.
- Set a time frame for your self-coaching session. The last thing you want to be doing is dwelling negatively for hours on a problem. This can turn into a form of negative malaise, something akin to procrastination. The objective of self-coaching is to positively unpack a problem in private with the aim of doing something about it. At the end of the timeframe commit to your action and then move on to do something else.
We will be bringing you a number of self-coaching question tracks which might help you to structure your sessions as well as a log to capture your actions, so watch this page over the coming weeks. Good luck!
Self-Coaching Tools - Go to the goals and motivation main page
The mind's response to goal setting - Read how the mind responds to a goal
Motivation and goals resources - Go to our motivation and goals directory page for an extensive list of useful resources.
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